…om dumheter och att ‘bara konstatera fakta’

Man behöver inte klicka runt i kommentarsfält särskilt länge för att stöta på riktigt fascinerande resonemang.

För några dagar sen skrev Isabella Löwengrip om charter och publicerade en några år gammal bild på sig självLite yngre, kommenterade hon själv. Lite smalare, anmärkte genast en läsare. Och så började diskussionen kring om det var en okej kommentar eller inte. Förutom de rätt vanliga men-skaffa-dig-ett-liv-invändningarna så dök ett annat vanligt men märkligt argument upp: det var ju bara ett konstaterande.

Ungefär så här: det är inte taskigt att ‘bara konstatera fakta’ och det ligger ingen värdering i det. Det är inte elakt eller ‘näthat’ eftersom det handlar om att påpeka ett ‘visuellt faktum’, och att uttrycka ‘första tanken som slår en’ utan att mena något negativt med det.

Som samtalsforskare är förstås den här sortens argumentation rätt kul. Dum, men kul.

För det första: det finns inget ‘bara’ i att ‘konstatera fakta’. Vi använder ord för att göra olika saker och de är därför inte värderingsfria. ‘Fakta’ allra minst. Det finns alltid anledning att fråga sig vad folk egentligen gör när de ‘bara ställer en fråga’, ‘bara konstaterar fakta’ eller ‘bara undrar’. Och det analyserar vi hela tiden när vi pratar med varandra, så det är inte rocket science precis. Det är det som gör att när någon ‘konstaterar’ att du har snygga byxor så svarar du inte ‘ja det har jag’, utan du säger ‘tack’, eftersom det inte alls var ett konstaterande utan en komplimang.

För det andra: vad någon ‘faktiskt menar’, eller om någon ‘tänkte något negativt’ med det hen sa är inte relevant. Vi kan inte veta vad folk tänker, bara vad de säger. Och om det som sägs är problematiskt så spelar det i situationen ingen roll vad tanken var. Har du någon gång råkat säga något som gjorde en person ledsen fast du inte menade det så? Den personen blev ledsen alldeles oavsett vad du menade (att man kan försöka reparera det sedan är en annan grej). Det intressanta att ta med sig från såna situationer är vad det var i det du sa som fick den effekten, och om du kan lära dig att uttrycka dig så att det inte blir så igen.

För det tredje: det är fullkomligt absurt att hävda att något som sägs skulle vara mindre problematiskt för att det är ‘sant’ (eller ett ‘faktum’, vilket är att säga ungefär samma sak). Om man köper det argumentet så innebär det att någon som säger ‘du är dum’ bara säger något taskigt om det skulle vara så att du inte råkar vara särskilt dum, annars är det inte taskigt, utan bara ett ‘faktum’. Det innebär att till exempel mobbing skulle värderas baserat på om den är ‘berättigad’ eller inte – om den mobbade är tjock, har fula glasögon, ärvda kläder eller något annat som de mobbade barnen i filmer brukar ha, då är det inte mobbing att säga det, enligt det här sättet att resonera.

Givetvis är de här argumenten helt galna, och just därför är det intressant att de faktiskt används som försvar, och att de tillåts fungera som det utan att ens bemötas (‘skaffa dig ett liv själv’ räknar jag inte som att bemöta ett argument…).

Jag tror att om vi oftare ställde varandra till svars för argument som inte håller, så skulle vi tänka efter lite mer innan vi kastade ur oss dumheter.

Och man behöver inte klicka runt i kommentarsfält särskilt länge för att se att det finns en hel del dumheter där ute.

Share

158 thoughts on “…om dumheter och att ‘bara konstatera fakta’

  1. “Jag tror att om vi oftare ställde varandra till svars för argument som inte håller, så skulle vi tänka efter lite mer innan vi kastade ur oss dumheter.” Kunde inte hålla med mer. Jag har blivit bättre på att ställa folk till svars när de säger saker som är bullshit (vilket på internet är extra vanligt), och man märker vilken skillnad det gör när de tvingas tänka efter vad de egentligen skrivit/sagt. Även fast de flesta slänger av sig kritik så fort det bara går så kanske de tar till sig det så småningom.

  2. Du skriver så bra, jag har också funderat i liknande banor… Fast jag tänker på hur enormt viktigt det kommer att bli att jag som lärare väger mina ord på guldvåg eftersom det jag säger kan få konsekvenser i en annan människas liv. Ett enormt ansvar.
    I bloggsfären finner man nog många förhastade kommentarer av folk som inte alltid tänker före, är bittra men det fina är alla peppande kommentarer och jag tycker att det verkar som om positiva kommentarer överväger. Dock inget jag undersökt närmare, det är bara en känsla jag har.
    Ha det fint!

    • Ja, visst är det härligt med all positiv energi från fina kommentarer! Men kanske är det så att det i mängd behövs ännu fler såna, för att uppväga det negativa?

  3. Samtalsforskning låter väldigt spännande, men klurigt med tanke på hur olika människor uttrycker sig, vilket iofs måste vara rena guldgruvan för en samtalsforskare.

  4. Sociala koder, svårt. Vad passar att säga i ett sammanhang? På ett mingelparty IRL är man försiktigare än på nätet, där sammanhanget kan växla vilt över tiden -även i en och samma diskussionstråd.

    En av mina favoritkaraktärer i TV-världen är Seven-of-nine i serien Star Trek Voyager. En underskön kvinna uppväxt bland maskiner, med total okunskap om människolivets finesser.

    För övrigt kan jag tipsa om de två orden “tycker jag” som man med fördel kan haka på sina konstateranden, så sparar man kanske några bräckliga egon.

  5. I absolutely love your site.. Pleasant colors & theme. Did you develop this amazing site yourself? Please reply back as I’m attempting to create my own site and want to find out where you got this from or exactly what the theme is named. Cheers.

  6. That is a very good tip especially to those fresh to the blogosphere. Brief but very accurate information… Thanks for sharing this one. A must read post.

  7. Hello there! I could have sworn I’ve been to this website before but after going through a few of the posts I realized it’s new to me. Regardless, I’m certainly pleased I found it and I’ll be bookmarking it and checking back regularly.

  8. I absolutely love your site.. Excellent colors & theme. Did you make this web site yourself? Please reply back as I’m looking to create my own website and would like to know where you got this from or just what the theme is named. Kudos.

  9. That is a very good tip especially to those fresh to the blogosphere. Brief but very precise information… Appreciate your sharing this one. A must read article.

  10. I really love your website.. Very nice colors & theme. Did you build this site yourself? Please reply back as I’m looking to create my very own website and would love to learn where you got this from or just what the theme is named. Cheers.

  11. Excellent blog you have here.. It’s difficult to find good quality writing like yours nowadays. I seriously appreciate people like you! Take care!!

  12. Having read this I thought it was extremely enlightening. I appreciate you finding the time and energy to put this short article together. I once again find myself spending a significant amount of time both reading and leaving comments. But so what, it was still worthwhile.

  13. I blog quite often and I truly appreciate your information. Your article has truly peaked my interest. I am going to take a note of your site and keep checking for new information about once a week. I opted in for your RSS feed too.

  14. Oh my goodness! Incredible article dude! Thank you, However I am having issues with your RSS. I don’t understand why I cannot subscribe to it. Is there anybody else getting identical RSS issues? Anyone who knows the answer will you kindly respond? Thanx!!

  15. Can I just say what a relief to uncover someone that really understands what they’re talking about on the internet. You definitely understand how to bring an issue to light and make it important. More and more people ought to look at this and understand this side of your story. I was surprised you are not more popular given that you most certainly have the gift.

  16. Howdy! This post couldn’t be written any better! Reading through this article reminds me of my previous roommate! He continually kept talking about this. I am going to send this article to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!

  17. Hi, I do believe this is a great site. I stumbledupon it ;) I will revisit yet again since i have book marked it. Money and freedom is the best way to change, may you be rich and continue to guide other people.

  18. An outstanding share! I have just forwarded this onto a friend who had been doing a little homework on this. And he actually ordered me lunch due to the fact that I stumbled upon it for him… lol. So allow me to reword this…. Thank YOU for the meal!! But yeah, thanx for spending time to discuss this subject here on your site.

  19. Great web site you have got here.. It’s difficult to find excellent writing like yours nowadays. I honestly appreciate individuals like you! Take care!!

  20. Hi there! This blog post couldn’t be written much better! Looking through this article reminds me of my previous roommate! He constantly kept preaching about this. I am going to forward this information to him. Pretty sure he’s going to have a good read. Thank you for sharing!

  21. I’m amazed, I must say. Seldom do I encounter a blog that’s both equally educative and entertaining, and let me tell you, you’ve hit the nail on the head. The issue is an issue that too few folks are speaking intelligently about. I’m very happy that I stumbled across this during my search for something concerning this.

  22. I blog quite often and I genuinely thank you for your content. This great article has really peaked my interest. I’m going to bookmark your site and keep checking for new details about once per week. I opted in for your Feed too.

  23. I’m impressed, I have to admit. Seldom do I come across a blog that’s both equally educative and interesting, and without a doubt, you have hit the nail on the head. The issue is an issue that not enough folks are speaking intelligently about. I’m very happy I found this during my search for something concerning this.

  24. Spot on with this write-up, I honestly believe that this amazing site needs much more attention. I’ll probably be returning to see more, thanks for the info!

  25. This is a great tip particularly to those new to the blogosphere. Brief but very accurate information… Thank you for sharing this one. A must read article!

  26. Hi, I do believe this is an excellent website. I stumbledupon it ;) I will revisit yet again since i have book marked it. Money and freedom is the greatest way to change, may you be rich and continue to guide other people.

  27. A motivating discussion is definitely worth comment. I do believe that you need to write more on this issue, it might not be a taboo matter but usually people don’t speak about such topics. To the next! Cheers!

  28. Having read this I thought it was extremely enlightening. I appreciate you finding the time and energy to put this informative article together. I once again find myself spending way too much time both reading and commenting. But so what, it was still worthwhile.

  29. Aw, this was an incredibly good post. Taking a few minutes and actual effort to create a top notch article… but what can I say… I procrastinate a lot and don’t seem to get nearly anything done.

  30. Hi there! I could have sworn I’ve been to this site before but after looking at many of the posts I realized it’s new to me. Regardless, I’m certainly pleased I found it and I’ll be bookmarking it and checking back frequently.

  31. Next time I read a blog, I hope that it doesn’t disappoint me just as much as this particular one. After all, I know it was my choice to read through, but I genuinely thought you would probably have something helpful to say. All I hear is a bunch of crying about something you can fix if you weren’t too busy searching for attention.

  32. Greetings, I do believe your website could be having web browser compatibility problems. When I look at your blog in Safari, it looks fine however, if opening in I.E., it has some overlapping issues. I just wanted to provide you with a quick heads up! Apart from that, excellent website.

  33. Aw, this was a really nice post. Finding the time and actual effort to make a very good article… but what can I say… I put things off a whole lot and never seem to get anything done.

  34. An interesting discussion is definitely worth comment. There’s no doubt that that you should write more on this subject, it might not be a taboo matter but usually folks don’t discuss these topics. To the next! Kind regards!

  35. I would like to thank you for the efforts you have put in writing this website. I really hope to see the same high-grade content by you in the future as well. In fact, your creative writing abilities has inspired me to get my very own website now ;)

  36. Good day! I just would like to offer you a big thumbs up for your great information you have got right here on this post. I am coming back to your web site for more soon.

  37. The next time I read a blog, Hopefully it won’t disappoint me just as much as this particular one. I mean, I know it was my choice to read through, nonetheless I truly believed you would probably have something helpful to say. All I hear is a bunch of moaning about something you could possibly fix if you were not too busy seeking attention.

  38. Right here is the perfect site for everyone who really wants to find out about this topic. You realize a whole lot its almost hard to argue with you (not that I really will need to…HaHa). You definitely put a fresh spin on a subject that has been discussed for ages. Great stuff, just wonderful.

  39. Your style is unique compared to other people I have read stuff from. Thanks for posting when you have the opportunity, Guess I will just book mark this site.

  40. Hi there! I simply would like to give you a big thumbs up for the excellent information you’ve got here on this post. I’ll be returning to your web site for more soon.

  41. Oh my goodness! Incredible article dude! Many thanks, However I am having troubles with your RSS. I don’t understand the reason why I am unable to join it. Is there anybody else getting identical RSS problems? Anybody who knows the answer will you kindly respond? Thanks.

  42. When I initially left a comment I seem to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now every time a comment is added I receive four emails with the exact same comment. Is there an easy method you can remove me from that service? Cheers.

  43. I blog frequently and I really appreciate your content. This article has really peaked my interest. I’m going to take a note of your blog and keep checking for new information about once per week. I opted in for your RSS feed too.

  44. Having read this I thought it was rather informative. I appreciate you taking the time and effort to put this information together. I once again find myself spending a lot of time both reading and posting comments. But so what, it was still worthwhile!

  45. I have to thank you for the efforts you’ve put in penning this website. I really hope to see the same high-grade blog posts by you in the future as well. In truth, your creative writing abilities has encouraged me to get my own website now ;)

  46. Your style is so unique compared to other people I have read stuff from. I appreciate you for posting when you’ve got the opportunity, Guess I’ll just book mark this web site.

  47. Aw, this was an exceptionally good post. Taking the time and actual effort to create a very good article… but what can I say… I procrastinate a whole lot and don’t manage to get anything done.

  48. After going over a number of the articles on your web page, I seriously appreciate your way of writing a blog. I saved it to my bookmark site list and will be checking back soon. Please visit my web site as well and tell me your opinion.

  49. An impressive share! I have just forwarded this onto a friend who had been doing a little research on this. And he in fact ordered me lunch due to the fact that I stumbled upon it for him… lol. So allow me to reword this…. Thanks for the meal!! But yeah, thanx for spending some time to discuss this subject here on your web site.

  50. Hi, I do believe this is a great blog. I stumbledupon it ;) I may revisit once again since I saved as a favorite it. Money and freedom is the best way to change, may you be rich and continue to help others.

  51. It’s nearly impossible to find educated people about this subject, but you sound like you know what you’re talking about! Thanks

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>